Faked Thai For Evenings When Everything Is Closed

While Fred was still reading this, Abelardo passed him over another card, this on for the Full Chicken Richness Canned Soup Company. “You must visit me,” he said. “Most of the time I am home.”
— Avram Davidson, Full Chicken Richness

1. Boil a cup of rice or whatever quantities you want.
2. Cut the chicken into bits and fry them. Right now, I used leftovers. It was much faster.
3. Cut the yellow (or in worst case scenario: green) paprika, and use the scissors on the onion leafs, and then cut the red chili pepper — one is enough, not one bit but one chili pepper fruit.
4. In  a frying pan, pour a bit red wine vinegar and some oil and mix in cajun spices, coriander, garam masala (careful! Not too much damnit!), red curry, ground roasted garlic, salt, sugar, black pepper, and some crushed peruvian pepper. Stir about a bit so that it’s this… brownish paste. Turn on the heat and when it’s a bit hot, pour over the newly boiled rice.
5. Stir about even more, add turmeric for colour and some Japanese soy. When you’ve stirred and the rice has gotten this yellow colour and has fried a while: add the paprika, onion, and chili peppers. Fry! Fry some more! Then add the chicken bits.
6. Eat it.